Authored By Shail Raghuvanshi:
It is easy to cry ‘Wolf’ when a woman’s modesty is outraged. But how many of these women have not actually provoked such incidents is not very hard to tell now-a-days. Mind you, I am not anti feminist nor do I live in self denial. I realize that social drinking is an accepted practice. In India especially, men seem to have the privileged right to indulge in social drinking. It is part of Indian lifestyle now. Many business contracts and deals are finalized in the spirited atmosphere of restaurants and hotels.
Sharing business ideas over pegs of alcohol seems to boost the professional spirit, it seems. But, what when there are women involved - educated, highly professional independent women? Or maybe, a bunch of youngsters who feel it is trendy and more feminist-like if they also drink like men/with men?
Dangerous cocktail of booze and woman Women drinking alcohol is not something new. In the time of the maharajas, kings and queens drank to their heart’s desire. So why wonder now? Well, for one, we have come a long way from those kingdom ages. And secondly, times have changed. Women have different responsibilities today so, does drinking make things any better? No and yes I am told again. No, because it does not make any difference whether a woman drinks or not. And yes, because drinking makes a woman don on an equal status in society with the men. Today, a woman can confidently walk up to the bar and order drinks for herself. She can have a couple of drinks with her women friends and feel better about herself. Or better still, feel one with the crowd comprising of both men and women. And finally, clients need to be kept happy and more often having a couple of drinks with them is all that is needed to clinch a deal. So, what is the fuss all about?
Of course, there is always the risk of getting shot like Jessica Lal did. Whether she drank herself or not, I cannot tell because I haven’t seen but she definitely provoked a man to kill her because of her presence in a bar! Yes, social attitudes towards a host of things are changing today in our society. We are also incorporating many global traits in our lifestyles today. A woman’s financial independence also influences many of the choices that she makes in life including drinking alcohol. In spite of being a conservative society in India certain things are still taboo for a woman, drinking alcohol being one of them. Now, why should this be so? Well, for one, I am sure no woman looks pretty drinking alcohol. Oh! She might look classy with finely manicured and polished nails delicately holding onto that glass or her pasted lips sipping the ‘nectar’. But, does she know when to stop? Actresses like Meena Kumari and other women public personalities who drank themselves to death for whatever reason didn’t seem to know when to stop and paid a heavy price for that. What if that booze binge with friends crossed the expected time? What if the clients suddenly decide they have some more things to sort out before the spirited meeting gets over? Will the woman stop drinking abruptly sticking to her allotted quota for the day or week? So what happens when the drinks go to her head? Will she know how to manage herself till she reaches home safely? Scientific reports state that women tend to get intoxicated faster than men due to the presence of less water in their bodies when compared to men of the same weight. When compared to men, drinking women have more chances of developing alcoholic hepatitis or cirrhosis. The greater liver damage risk for women who drink is said to be due to the effects of the female reproductive hormone estrogen. Breast, liver and rectum cancer are other risks for women consuming alcohol. If this does not appear scary enough for women wanting to drink or currently drinking alcohol then, do stop to wonder about the aggression that women face from the world both mentally and sexually.
There are innumerable cases of women getting victimized after drinking as many men seem to presume that a drinking woman is only asking for a pass or even worse (as if to say the unaccounted cases of non drinking women getting raped or sexually assaulted are not enough!). Remember, how a bunch of intoxicated men tried to size up a newly married woman in a discotheque only because she happened to want to celebrate her first married new year in the atmosphere of drinking men and women? I am not saying that celebrating new year is wrong, but where and when is the choice that has to be wisely made in today’s society where people are there ever ready to pounce on a vulnerable woman. Ofcourse, the society or status a woman belongs to also determine her choice. However, a woman can always say ‘no’ if she wants to instead of stupidly tagging along with the crowd. Women have lesser reasons to drink when compared to men then why do they even try it? Will they be known as lesser mortals if they do not drink? Drinking alcohol does not make a woman a feminist. Isn’t it better appearing a spoilsport and not consuming alcohol instead of letting the alcohol drink you! What say you?
NOTE: The author is a writer by profession and can be contacted at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it
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Vaibhav
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... Shail (by your name I shall assume you are a man, I have yet to meet a woman named Shail), if you would have pointed out that drinking in itself is bad and a waste of money and health in itself, then perhaps you would have been right. But then if you find fault in a woman being assaulted or a woman having to suffer *because* she as a woman has had something to drink, I say you are wrong. Trying to find the fault with the victim especially if they are of the fairer sex is a practice which should be stopped. 'Of course, there is always the risk of getting shot like Jessica Lal did. Whether she drank herself or not, I cannot tell because I haven’t seen but she definitely provoked a man to kill her because of her presence in a bar!' With statements like these you are trying to shift the blame from the guy who shot her to her being shot in cold blood. Why not try and prevent the acts of violence. Why do you want to be like some religious cleric who bans skirts in his country because 'they cause earthquakes' (true story, google it up) It's people like you who are in actuality part of the problem. I reject your solution, and I uphold the right of every woman to drink (unless drinking in itself is banned, which may turn out to be a good thing) |
Shail Raghuvanshi
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... Hi Vaibhav. It always feels great when people take time out to read something and comment. So, I appreciate your comment. I hope you understand that my article is about the pros and cons of women drinking. It is about the choice of drinking in a society which is not yet broad minded enough to accept it. It is about the vulnerability of a woman in today's world where she gets physically assaulted often so, drinking does not help her. Instead, it only serves to make her condition more vulnerable. It is about being safe than sorry especially when you have your self respect intact and have nothing to lose by not drinking. As for me, Vaibhav, yes, I am Shail and a woman and broadmined enough to write about something that I find affecting and hurting many persons of the gender that I belong to. That's why the article. |
A.Hari
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... Thanks for your interesting analysis. No one can pass generalised ruling whether women can drink or not. It is upto each individual to decide after understanding the consequences of drinking. BTW, I read your poem about father in your blog and found it very interesting. http://musenmotivation.wordpress.com/ A.Hari |
Mradul
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... I agree with Vaibhav here. If you are saying that women (and only them) should abstain from drinking for the reason that it might provoke someone in vicinity, then one might expect you to go on to say someday that wrong doings in a state of intoxication (on the part of a man) should be blamed on alcohol rather than the man. Such events (as you have pointed out) are an indication of lack of decency and control on men's part and women must not be held responsible because that in essence makes the culprit far less accountable and guilty. |
Shishir Kumar Jha
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... Well with ur article its quite clear that women are more affected than men due to intoxication.... But man u should only create awareness by citing its pity consequences... Moreso i disagree with the citation of That "Jessica Lal Murder Case" as u r trying 2 prove the point when there is no need as the matter is already crystal clear!! I ask u 1 thing "Have u ever met or heard about any single person who doesn't know THE ALARMING ALCOHOLIC AFFECTS" If not then y u r proving!!!! |
Srinivas Iyer
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... Dear Shail, I stumbled upon this website accidentally. And I am quite surprised by your ideas. Superficially it seems like you are okay with women drinking. However your justification against it seems to prove otherwise. Women get assaulted in India whether they are inebriated or not. Men are as much vulnerable to bad health as women are, due to alcohol. There are no statistics to prove what you claim (except may be under medication or pregnancy). Above all, drinking does not make you a drunkard. And all the effects you are talking about are for people who are addicted. Just as one cannot dictate who eats what (whether meat or beef), no one has a right to impose, under any circumstance, leave alone gender, what one consumes, as long as there is no violations of law (such as driving under influence). |
Shail Raghuvanshi
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... Hi Mradul. Nice of you to comment. Since this article is basically about women and wine, ie, women drinking alcohol the necessary points are mentioned about how drinking makes it difficult for women. I don't believe that alcohol is the culprit. I believe that men or women drinking it and not knowing when to stop are the culprits. And since it is proved that scientifically women suffer more when intoxicated, it is only natural that they keep away. |
Shail Raghuvanshi
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... Hi Shishir, You have hit the nail on the head! Yes, nobody is unaware of the ill effects of alcohol consumption and yet they do! So, that's why it is all the more necessary that all those who drink (esp women) stop. Of course, this is only my personal opinion. Women who want to drink inspite and despite the ill effects have already made their choice! |
Shail Raghuvanshi
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... Hi Srinivas, Nice of you to express your views. Whatever gave you the view that I am for women drinking.? Of course, men are equally at risk when they drink but my article is about women drinking, not men. Secondly, my article is not an imposition of views, it is just a view by a common man, sorry woman quite unlike what you have mentioned,"no one has a right to impose, under any circumstance, leave alone gender, what one consumes, as long as there is no violations of law." Surely, everyone has a right to express one's view as long as one doesn't hurt anyone's sentiments. And I am definitely not doing that!! I don't appreciate women drinking but as I mentioned in my comments, if a woman does drink she has made her choice inspite of knowing the ill-efffects. She may not become a drunkard or an addict as you mentioned but the fact that drinking doesn't make her state any better remains true. |
Rishab Mukherjee
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... Hi Shail Here's what I think: Jessica wasn't shot because of her "presence" in the bar. By the same logic, it would seem that the unfortunate people who passed away in the Mumbai terror attacks would be because of their "presence" in the restaurant. But that does seem a bit ridiculous to say the least, and I'm sure you'd agree. The issue is that malicious minded people came into those venues with intent to cause harm to others. What they were consuming isn't even part of the equation. Secondly, I feel that everybody knows about alcohol and its effect on people. In fact, many people drink not just for fun, but also to get that "buzz" and tipsy feeling where they feel they lose their inhibitions (which may be fun for them). However, I do believe that everyone should be responsible for the consequences of the amount of alcohol they consume. So if a man gets mugged because of returning home in a drunken stupor, or if a lady gets molested because she was drunk and flung herself around strangers, such victims should take steps to refrain from over drinking. Others who have been fortunate to not have experienced such trauma should take pre-emptive measures to drink responsibly. It is true that sometimes, in today's society, being a social drinker maybe a catalyst for business. In such cases, people (who should be aware of their alcohol tolerance levels), should order their drinks accordingly (with more/less potent alcohol). I feel this issue is independent of gender. If you consider drinking to be a vice, then its a vice for both males and females, else for none. If you say so, women are vulnerable targets in many parts of the world, and I think alcohol is the least of their problems. When the "attacker" has a malicious intent in his/her mind, there is little that the victim can do, except take pre-emptive measures. For example, don't take dark alleys when returning home late, or carry a can of pepper spray, or travel in a group etc. I feel that you should make a stronger opinion, and have stronger justifications behind it. Hope to see your work again. Cheers! Rishab. |
Shail Raghuvanshi
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... Hi Rishab, I agree fully with what you have mentioned. Alcohol is a vice for both men and women. But since I was asked to write on the issue of women drinking I had mentioned the necessary points. Yes, maybe, a stronger argument would have made the article more convincing. Hopefully, the next time you see my piece here, you will have no complaints as far as the justification part is concerned. Cheers to You too! Shail |
