Authored By:Mradul Sharma
"There is very little you can beat into a child, but no limit to what you can hug out of it" Astrid Lindgren(Swedish author) When I think of corporal punishment (from Latin "corpus" meaning "body"), I am ineluctably led back to the time when i used to be at the receiving end and it is not difficult to recollect the explosive resentment that I ended up stuffed with, which eventually found assorted ways (and let me say, not entirely harmless for myself or others) to vent itself out. And I am bound to think that it has to be no different for any other child. What essentially lies at the heart of physical punishment?
Is it wanting the child to do what one desires or what is correct? This, in itself is half the problem. Very often teachers (and parents as well) punish or pester children just to have them do what they want them to do without sufficient rationale behind it. The reason can range from simple impatience (or indifference) to adopt a more reasonable approach in trying to confront the child’s actual problem and talking to or working with him to solve it, to a deep rooted and yet ubiquitous one of a teacher’s ego (or self-esteem so to say) extracting its share of extraneous authority in order to keep up with his strict teacher image. In case the latter holds true (that is, the reason for punitive action being a fair and thought out one), we come to the point of actually having an arguable situation. Though a lot of people (elder mostly) are of the opinion that physical form of punishment becomes necessary at some point even if the teacher’s (or parent’s) position stands compromised as someone who could be judged in a bad light for pertaining to such a thing by the children or a third person, I am still of the opinion that almost in all practical situations there is a better way out than inflicting physical form of punishment. Often people in well established positions advocate the view by saying that had it not been for the thrashings by their elders they wouldn’t have accomplished whatever they managed to. Of course they could be right.
Well, the thing is not whether the point is made (you can make your point to anyone holding him at gunpoint) but whether there is a better way to make it. Who knows what these people could have achieved if they were made to do the supposedly correct things in a correct and amiable way. What people talk only of is the people reformed even though there are many others who have been led into dismal lives for fear of the rod. And besides, we cannot ignore the unacceptable effects of this form of violence as in anxiety, depression, malice, lack of self confidence (which is an obvious by-product of regular battering) etc. Also, as Lindgren said, while adopting such ways we deprive ourselves of the multitude of possibilities that a loving gesture might in its place be capable of, for a similar cause. What works for violent punishment is the imbibing of fear which in turn can be based only on the argument that the children in question are not mature enough to be made to understand the effects of their incorrect actions. In this case, while fear might work as a temporary solution, it will fail to solve the problem in the long term, along with producing a plethora of other difficulties. What can be done in such cases is to let the child experience the consequences of his actions and learn by his own mistake, but that again demands decisive courage on the part of parents and teachers.
In case of possible dire consequences of such a mistake the rod might eventually stand a case, but this rests with the judgement and wisdom of the guardian. Now, coming to the most difficult part of the problem. Treatment of children who understand the cause and effect of their actions but do not care for what is right and are adamant to pursue their own set of standards. Again, fear can only be a short term refuge until the person breaks free (one cannot flog a child forever), breaks down (which happens frequently as we all know), or strategically finds a way to evade the punishment while appearing to have been reformed (which I am inclined to think is generally the case). He might in the long term come to realize his shortcoming and mend his ways but that should not necessarily be credited to the sticks he bore. Having said all the above, I also believe that while banning corporal punishment might ideally appear as a simple solution to the problem, in all probability it is not a complete one.
Though it might seem contradictory, this is because one cannot do this without leaving the teachers with a feeling of helplessness at the hands of children who, in certain circumstances could be led into exploiting the situation with this knowledge, even though good and methodical teachers might never need such forms at their disposal. Thus, the only plausible solution for this problem lies with the wisdom and judgement of our teachers and parents who should be, must be made to learn and acknowledge the ways they can make their children learn and receive in a better way and not let their own hindrances or failures come in the way of their children. This can be done in diverse ways like counselling teachers and parents, airing documentaries on the subject, enquiring about such incidences and learning from them and so on but all this is easier said than done in a country where children still die for the lack of food.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts, For they have their own thoughts. You may house their bodies but not their souls, For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
- Kahlil Gibran on children (The prophet)
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Riju
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... If your buttocks burn, you know you have done wrong. ~African Proverbs Sayings of South African Origin~ well written article.The mutual understanding between the teacher and student is must..That may save so many lives and the jobs of the teachers.Its well said:- You may give them your love but not your thoughts, For they have their own thoughts. You may house their bodies but not their souls, For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday. - Kahlil Gibran on children (The prophet) |
Vaibhav Srivastav
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... It is of paramount importance for people to understand the violence (of any kind) solves nothing, and violence on children is the worst kind. A good job done by highlighting this issue Mradul, I hope many parents and teachers read it and change their opinion |
Sumit Pandey
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... I totally agree there can always be a way instead of corporal punishment, corporal punishment is more like a vent through which our feeling leaks through. Its a resort of lousy teachers to contain children, for whom teaching is just a money making business or it had just becomes habit without giving the second thought. Its like it has to be done. Teaching is a sacred profession, ought to be taken seriously. Then they cry for the misbehavior of children. An oppressed mind is good for nothing. Very well written article and very good poem quoted. |
Hemant
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... very nicely written and let me add to it another piece of writing just to corroborate the write-up Priceless Dr. Arun Gandhi, grandson of Mahatma Gandhi and founder of the M.K. Gandhi Institute for Non-violence, in his June 9 lecture at the University of Puerto Rico, shared the following story as an example of "non-violence in parenting": "I was 16 years old and living with my parents at the institute my grandfather had founded 18 miles outside of Durban, South Africa, in the middle of the sugar plantations. We were deep in the country and had no neighbors, so my two sisters and I would always look forward to going to town to visit friends or go to the movies. One day, my father asked me to drive him to town for an all-day conference, and I jumped at the chance. Since I was going to town, my mother gave me a list of groceries she needed and, since I had all day in town, my father ask me to take care of several pending chores, such as getting the car serviced. When I dropped my father off that morning, he said, ' I will meet you here at 5:00 p.m., and we will go home together. ' After hurriedly completing my chores, I went straight to the nearest movie theatre. I got so engrossed in a John Wayne double-feature that I forgot the time. It was 5:30 before I remembered. By the time I ran to the garage and got the car and hurried to where my father was waiting for me, it was almost 6:00. He anxiously asked me, ' Why were you late? ‘I was so ashamed of telling him I was watching a John Wayne western movie that I said, ' The car wasn't ready, so I had to wait, not realizing that he had already called the garage. When he caught me in the lie, he said: ' There’s something wrong in the way I brought you up that didn’t’ give you the confidence to tell me the truth. In order to figure out where I went wrong with you, I'm going to walk home 18 miles and think about it. ' So, dressed in his suit and dress shoes, he began to walk home in the dark on mostly unpaved, unlit roads. I couldn't leave him, so for five-and-a-half hours I drove behind him, watching my father go through this agony for a stupid lie that I uttered. I decided then and there that I was never going to lie again. I often think about that episode and wonder, if he had punished me the way we punish our children, whether I would have learned a lesson at all. I don't think so. I would have suffered the punishment and gone on doing the same thing. But this single non-violent action was so powerful that it is still as if it happened yesterday. "That is the power of non-violence." "Forgiveness is giving up my right to hate anyone for hurting me." |
Sangeeta Goswami
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... Beating and shouting in anger is not the right ways to handle children. They have a mind of their own and can also understand polite language,they dont mind us pointing their errors, but wat they oppose is the method and manner in which it is done. "The eight-year-old student of Mirambika School, who ran away apparently fed up with the frequent spankings at home, received a kick from his father and another sound thrashing from a cop after he was found." after reading news lines like this, I feel the parents better consult a Psychiatrist so that they can be good on all the aspects of managing a child.........This article is a good insight for all the parents and teachers who need to learn how to treat their children and students.....Well written.....Keep it up! |
Mradul
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... Thanks to all for positive feedback. Its a very relevant matter which deserves concern. |
Siddhartha
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... very well written....it says something about corporal punishment....and we have some philosphy,some psychology and some history in the form of quotes.....i was simply too lazy to read the entire thing....but very well written indeed  |
Find antique dealers
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... If your buttocks burn, you know you have done wrong. ~African Proverbs Sayings of South African Origin~ well written article.The mutual understanding between the teacher and student is must..That may save so many lives and the jobs of the teachers.Its well said:- You may give them your love but not your thoughts, For they have their own thoughts. You may house their bodies but not their souls, For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday. - Kahlil Gibran on children (The prophet) |
